We've been informed long ago, that marital problems come from the way a lady handles the home. We are the home maker/builder, men are just the field workers. So, if any marriage hits the rock, the lady is apportion a large chunk of the blame. Come on! Don't frown at me, its the take of man and the entire society/generation we belong. Well, not doubting the fact that ladies are doing their best to let the men know it isn't proper any more to leave the whole work for them but that's not the bone of contention today.
Many young ladies don't even school themselves before getting married. Part of the reason is that: you have sex with the man, get pregnant and gbam! you got married. Most cases both won't be sure of the real reason they got married; if it is for love or the baby and some men may feel trapped and start acting funny in the house knowingly and unknowingly.
To find solution to our breaking and shaking marriages, here are some things ladies must ring into their hearts before putting the ring on their fingers.
1. The most important and first thing is your relationship with God. Build if you don't have one with Him. No matter how good your husband will be, as a woman you must be close to God so that you can handle the challenges of being married and in living peacefully with your in-laws and family members as well as enemies.
2. Emotional Maturity----Everybody talks about physical maturity(age wise) but people don't really pay much attention to the emotional part. What do you do when your spouse annoys you so much in front of the children? Are you matured enough to play nice in front of the children and take the drama to the bedroom where you will be alone to speak freely.
3. Respect your husband decision. Hehehe! Sometimes, it is painful that the husband decision supersedes that of the wife. Especially when you know you are right. But you do or should know in the marriage ride; your husband is the driver and you are the conductor; He is the President and you are the Vice and the popular one of him being the head and you the neck. Even if you are financially supporting him, never take decisions for him. Also, it is best not to argue issues too long. And definitely you won't be doing right by talking back at him. Don't crucify me yet! Talk with or talk to him, instead of back at him.
4. Love languages ......what is your spouse's love language, his temperament? Can you read your spouse to be, is he shy, outspoken etc. Money doesn't build a happy marriage, love, understanding and many more good qualities all embedded in Love can and will sustain your family.
5. Always pray for your husband. An old adage says "When a rope is shaking, the birds that perched on it, will not be at peace or safe." As a woman, always intercede for your husband. If it is well with him, it will be well will you and the entire household.
6. Encourage your husband to save and invest. You should be able to encourage your husband to save for the future. Its not all earnings that are meant to be spent. Don't wait until you have it in abundance before you realise you have to save. For out of every little income, some should be kept away for the unforeseeable future. Basically, don't be the type to cook a pot of soup today and expects to finish its content that same day.
7. Always feed well and look good. The best way to keep your marriage is for you to always look beautiful. That is; never go out of the market, keep him wanting more each day; you know what I mean....Lol! Seriously! Look after yourself and your husband eyes will stay on you, no matter your age.
Beautiful ladies, if you can ring these and many more you'll learn along the way into your heart, I believe the ring will fit real good on your finger. But after all, always pray for the grace of God to be with you and your husband because you two need God to walk in one accord.
Biblical Guide: Ephesians 5:25. Cheers!