Tuesday, July 14, 2015

The Clash and Changes From the Lady You Were to the Woman You've Become.

Okay! So, I've heard so much about the sacrifices ladies have to make after marriage, that I'm beginning to wonder if I have to block my ears with wax when next one of my female folks comes wining? Lol! And of argument that married women are more indecently dressed these days than the single ladies. You know about the usual; the need to keep looking good for the man,  restriction of movement/lack of freedom to come and go as thou pleaseth, the well maintained shaped being filled with water and fat after child birth, of course, it'll take a lot of discipline to have a semblance of what it used to be. And the mess being created on daily if not hourly basis by the children, the male folks not appreciative enough etc in the voice of my college days teachers.

Well, lets get down to some real business; change they say is the only constant thing in life. How you handle the phases/changes in your life is what will determine the lasting impact it will have. You made a deal, the moment you said 'I do' not to no longer live for yourself only but also for someone else and the many more that will come tagging along after some months. Being a woman, your duty is on an automated resumption calender of being a care-giver. Meaning; in the welfare department your needs may be at the very bottom. And this maybe too much to handle because of all that you'll be giving up on. Hmmm! I'm not to keep going round the table like this but I need you to be able to drift along, hence the circled writings.
A Quick Analysis of the Different Stages of Change.
- The moment a lady says 'yes' to a marriage proposal, there's a beginning of an inner beauty being reflected, a serene peaceful wrap around her and the extra need to smile, laugh over, even the most idiotic jokes. Then, the marriage plans begins and the worry lies draws the brows together; worry over getting things done properly and for the success of the day. That the once buoyant attitude gives way to a snappy one. I believe this is when friends usually comes handy or a wedding planner if one can afford it. By the way, the old women in the village are all suspect until the wedding is over. Hence the need to bind and rebind until the ropes will protest and even then, no loosing. Lol!
- After the wedding, the most beautiful journey begins and the discovering of the pleasure of physical intimacy and sexual fulfillment (Closes eyes with one hand and continued typing with the other *winks*). The beauty of it is that; no matter how skinny a lady is, there's addition of flesh and curves in the right places. In some cases, the lady might become fat if such is in her linage. And that marks the beginning of wanting what was once there.
- The pregnancy phase comes along with changes in the body to colour. A friend once said "from figure 8 to figure 0" Light skin becomes dark as the stages advances and dark skin becomes darker. Because she can barely have access to cream her body properly as the bulge (baby bump) gets in the way. The woman is comforted with the fulfilling experience of bringing a child into this world. While the lady you were may probably be wishing  babies can just be picked up from some nest. She needs to maintain her body shape. Hence the woman needs to prepare emotionally, physically, mentally, logically in dealing with all of the changes and experiences.
- After giving birth, the primary duty  of the woman is to care for the new born child. But the need to also care for yourself is also important. And you know 'the lady shape' has given way to 'mummy shape.' And as much as you would have loved to get  your old self back again, these things take time. Also, expect the change in your sleep pattern which can sometimes affect your mood and the wish of not having to go through this process or the men getting to share a part of it.
Then, the years gradually roll by while you watch tiny hands/feet depend on your strength to stand, your love for nourishment, your care for satisfaction etc. Their complete dependence becomes your whole life existence. Gradually, the lady you were realises; no shape, colour is as great as being the woman you've become. Of course! a little bit or much fuller you've become, if you do remember to care for yourself when taking care of the entire family, you'll be fine. And this is not about going overboard, all in the name of still being the 'hot babe' for your partner. Please leave that hustling for those still in searching arena. Oops! even in such arena 'simplicity is beautiful.' So, simply dress to suit your present body size in a prime and proper way and I tell you, you just may be getting more than you bargained for, from him. Cheers!


  1. choi!!!! Onoz... na to comme da take lessons fromu na?


  2. Beautiful and educating write up. Plus it's a beautiful blog you have here thumbs up.. Thanks for stopping by my space..